14th year house bound

[hiddenite]

Oh by the way Jacques do I owe you another positive because you suggested a security system with a card?

[Jacques]

I would love you to say something nice about yourself, but it was more of a suggestion, so it is up to you my angel.

How are you this afternoon? sorry i dosed off earlier, my wrist was sore and i needed to rest it.

Yes you have me all to yourself at the moment

[hiddenite]

Yay ok I have nice blue eyes.
I hope your wrist is ok you promised me you would go to the Dr if it wasn't better.
If I could I would take you.

[Jacques]

Oh that is so nice Karen, blue eyes blond hair, wow!!!!

Sorry my wrist only hurts now if I do heavy lifting, I just pushed it a bit to much today. It is getting better, it is just taking a little time.

Mum has been strapping it when I go out to the shed, I just forgot this morning.

Thank you for you concern Karen, I feel so lucky having someone care about me.

Karen you have done so well today, we had some troubles early on, but had a few laughs, I know today is usually tough for you, but I hope today was a little easier for you.

[hiddenite]

Thanks Jacques your support today has been amazing and yes I did have some fun and a laugh. I'm so lucky to have you as my friend.

Yes I do worry  because I care what happens to you. 

[Jacques]

My angel,

I am so glad you made it through today with less worry and negative thoughts, i really do think it is time for you to move on, never forget, burt you have suffered so much in the past, i just want you to enjoy life from now on, you have two girls, a home, a new hair do, it is time for you to be happy.

Karen i know deep down you are a wonderful person, a loving mother, and i know one day you will see yourslef as a woman instead of a person, hearing you say nice things about yourself, it gives me hope that you will slowly build self-worth and self-esteem, Karen, today was a tough day, i know that, but i remember you this time last year, you where struggling to go on, you could not even come close to saying anything nice about yourself, let alone smile.  You have come a long way Karen, you must realise this.

Even now, as i write this, i have a big smile on my face, knowing you have taken the first small steps into your wonderful new life, a life of no fear, a life of happy moments, a life being content with who you are and where you live. 

Karen thank you for showing me even on tough days, it does not have to be all negativity, their can be some bright moments.

Jacques

[hiddenite]

Jacques such beautiful words. I wish I could live up to them.

Maybe while you hold hope for me one day I'll be able to believe those words.

I rang lifeline this afternoon I needed to stay in the present which has been so difficult today.

I'm sorry I've taken up so much of your time today.

I hate to think where I would be without your support.

Tomorrow I have to meet my new psychologist. I don't think I need to explain how I feel about that.

I'm also going to get my tax done so a difficult day ahead.

Yea I know break it down into smaller pieces and distract.

How is your wrist j, maybe put a pack of frozen peas on it. Or ice if you have it.

Thinking of you

[Jacques]

Karen,

I know one day you will believe those words, it will just take time, i really believe that, one day you and i will be talking about the past without sadness or anxiousness, it will just be a memory.

I am glad you rang lifeline, you know where your limit is and seek help when required, i am so proud of you, their is no shame in asking for help.

Karen, i have really enjoyed today, it has helped me as much as you, it helps keep me in the present also, i think to much when i have no one to talk to, my mind drifts into the past often, just like you.

Karen guess what? i will be here for you tomorrow, we will work through it like we did today. please remember no matter how hard life becomes you have friends, and i am always here for you no matter what.

Good girl, you know how this is done, if tomorrow you need reminding how to cope i will remind you, gently guide you through the day.

My wrist is good tonight, as i said it is just a little weak still, if i push it to hard it gets sore, i just need to slow down.

[Jacques]

Karen changing minds is starting soon, please promise me you will turn it off if it distresses you too much, or talk to me, i don't want to see you triggered by it, it is going to be tough, but i am going to watch it.

Please be safe, i know you will trigger, it will bring back to many memories.

[hiddenite]

Jacques it's sure going to trigger.

Jacques don't watch if you cant