Morning Check-in

[Dreamy]

@tyme oh nice. 

It's 41⁰ here, way too hot. 

[avant-garde]

@tyme 

I don't explicitly ask why, but I know they have a strong desire to help me and that I don't often let them. 

Whether that it's they're overzealous when I give them the chance, inexperienced with those less fortunate, or that they are all I could be and want to help me get there. 

But for some reason my voice and opinion doesn't come into it. 

My church has a deep pride problem that they have the opportunity to help me get where they see I should be, a mother, a wife, they act as parents when I don't need parents, I need friends

[tyme]

Awww @avant-garde 

That's so so hard. I hope this letter you have written doesn't fall on deaf ears. 

What would be helpful from the forums community at this time? Anything in particular you think we can do to make it even a little easier for you?

[avant-garde]

@tyme 

My letter was well written? 

My elder is good at responding, it just takes him some time, and he's moving house at the moment. 

If my elder doesn't respond with at least some understanding, I'll send it to my pastor, he has no idea about Delilah and has only met her once.

[avant-garde]

@Dreamy 

How could I be so stupid! 

How could I even think that this elder was different! 

That this elder would see me! 

That this elder would hear me! 

That anyone would even consider helping me! 

When all he can say is 

I appreciate you sharing this information.

I am not in a position to look into this immediately.

What I will say for myself is that I know God has forgiven me for all my sins so that makes me quick to forgive others.

I was such an idiot

I should've known better

[Dreamy]

@avant-garde oh sweetheart i hear you. 

I'm just at the shops but I'm sitting with you and I'll reply properly soon ❤️

[avant-garde]

@Dreamy 

Coffee

[Dreamy]

@avant-garde coffee sounds good. I just got home. 

I'm sorry how this elder has made you feel but please know that you are not stupid or an idiot, his response/reaction is not a reflection of how you are as a person.

How are you feeling now sweetheart? 

[avant-garde]

@Dreamy 

Working on the jigsaw puzzle, last night's poem is about it

I have my coffee

I still feel like I should've known better

[Dreamy]

@avant-garde i did see the jigsaw puzzle, i love the picture. 

I'm glad you have coffee.

I hear you when you feel you should've known better but the reality is that we expect to be treated or responded to differently and i don't see anything wrong with that when it should come down to compassion and understanding.